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Friday, August 23, 2013

My Top 10 List of Giant Movie Monsters

   Inspired by the Laughing Ferret's blog post on movie monsters (not the first time that has happened!), I have decided that emulation is the sincerest form of flattery. Thus, my own


#10: Tyrannosaurus Rex

   From Jurassic Park. He eats the obnoxious lawyer. 'Nuff said? Poor thing probably got indigestion from eating that greasy junk food.

#9: Graboids

   This movie monster was the real star (sorry, Kevin Bacon) of the absolute B-grade joy movie Tremors. Now, if only they could fly.

#8: THEM!

   The height of 1950's atomic power gone wrong movies. The giant ants of THEM! had no names, but they left a stink of formic acid and boy, did they like sugar.

#7: The Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man

   Who says your giant monsters can't be lovable food icons from your childhood? Not Ray Stantz! It's... the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man. But Bill knew how to take care of him - all you need now is a 50-Foot Tall Woman (with negotiable virtue). Monsters can be funny, too.

#6: King Ghidorah

   If two heads are better than one, then what about three? Flying three-headed lightning-breathing dragon? Why, yes, thank you!

#5: Smaug

   I love Smaug, the Great and Powerful. He is all that a D&D red dragon should be. He laid waste to an entire dwarven kingdom. He lives in a mountain lair that can only be reached by a secret tunnel. He's powerful, huge, flying, fire-breathing, treasure-hoarding, and - here's the weakness - arrogant as Hell! Yes, Smaug's weakness wasn't the tiny chink in his armoured belly, but his hubris, in that he unwittingly showed Bilbo his vulnerable spot rather than simply flaming him to ashes.

#4: Vermithrax Pejorative

   The eponymous beast from the 1981 Disney film Dragonslayer - still the only Disney film with frontal male nudity! The Verm-ster was a bad, old dragon, just wanted some nice tender virgins for it's babies. He beats out Smaug only because Smaug was animated in a cartoon, and Vermithrax looked real (in 1981).

#3: Great Cthulhu

   So what if it's silent? It's an Elder God. You wouldn't understand what it was saying anyway, and just hearing its voice would drive you mad. Ftaghn!

#2: King Kong

   Yes, he's just a giant ape. And he never should have beaten Godzilla - darned American screenwriters and producers messed that one up. But he is an icon of the giant monster movie genre. And he did it all for love.

#1: Godzilla

   There can be only one, and this is the King of Monsters. The Big G is iconic, even through his multiple incarnations and his varying attitudes vis-a-vis destroying or saving humanity. Heck, he's even been a she on at least one occasion. He's had cartoons, a million movies, stuffed toys, a bubble gum, etc., etc.


Don M said...

good list J, I'll have to give mine some thought...)

Michael Awdry said...

Yes, that works for me - Graboids just have to be there.

Laughing Ferret said...

Fun List! Jurassic TRex nearly made mine too, and while not a big Tremors fan, it's made me realize I should have included the Dune Worm. It's just so hard to limit to 10!

J Womack, Esq. said...

I almost added the great sand worms from Dune as well. Best part of that whole movie.